Tips to Healthy and Happy Living

REST: Take enough time to rest. A tired body and a tired mind finds it very difficult to cope with the challenges of daily life and living. Go to sleep around 10.00 or 10.30 and wake up at around 5.00 or 5.30. Working late hours is a myth and only brings suffering and sickness in later years.

Work: Learn to share, distribute or delegate your work, among your colleagues. You will be surprised at the amount of joy you will create in your own and others lives. Be aware that the limitations of physical time do not allow any single individual, (however clever and efficient) to do everything under the sun.

     

Be aware of the fears that prevent you from sharing your work and responsibilities with colleagues and confreres.

Nourishment: Make sure you take enough and healthy nourishment. Be aware about your beliefs, fears and hang-ups concerning the food you eat. Eating is a trained habit, formed from beliefs generally made in childhood. Habits can be changed. Food as such NEVER causes sickness.

                     Exercise: Take time to exercise your body. A brisk walk, with head held high and hands swinging, early in the morning, definitely is a very useful beginning of the day. Combine this with positive affirmations and deep breathing, and you are guaranteed a healthy and happy life.

                     Holistic: Have a holistic approach to life. Body, Mind and Spirit. When the three are in alignment, you are assured of health and happiness. The Body gives physical signals (aches, pains, etc) and the Spirit gives emotional Signals (anger, depression, etc) that all is not well in the Mind.

                      Privacy: Keep enough time and space for your personal self. Love thy neighbour as thyself…Lev.19/18 Mat.19/19. Take time to be STILL, IN BODY MIND AND SPIRIT. Do the things you really like doing. Reading, writing, listening to music, being with people you love, gardening or relaxing in a garden.

                      Healing: Take time to heal yourself. Practice positive affirmations daily. Let go of memories. Forgive yourself and every one in your life. Start training yourself, to stop criticizing and punishing, yourself and others.

I LOVE MYSELF JUST THE WAY I AM! 

I LOVE THE WORLD JUST THE WAY IT IS!

The above is not exhaustive. I am sure there is a lot more you can add to it. But remember “… an oak tree takes a hundred years to grow! If you want an oak tree, plant it today, not tomorrow!”

                                                                                                   by malcolm sj

Prayer to Heal Your Life

THANK YOU LORD,

For the gift of my life. 
I am beautiful, I am wonderful
I am your image and likeness. 
I am the temple of your spirit. 
I love and appreciate myself, 
I accept myself 
with deep joy and happiness 
Thank you Lord 
for the gift of my life.

Thank you lord,

For the many persons in my life;
My parents, my brothers and sisters,

(my husband/wife/children)

My relatives and friends.
I believe that they all love me

and I love and accept them all.

Thank you Lord,

For all those who have loved me

And continue loving me still.
Thank you Lord, For all those

Who find it difficult to love me.

I thank you too, for all those whom

I find it difficult to love.

I am willing to love and accept them.

I do not always love myself,

I do not always love other persons.
I am willing to forgive myself,

I am willing to forgive others.
Yes I love myself,

Thank you Lord

For the gift of my life.

Finally I thank you lord

for loving me unconditionally

Amen.

                                                                                   By Br. Malcolm SJ

Malcolm sj - Migraine healed -Episode4 Eng #ChallengesinFamilyLife

What are you doing to improve the Quality of your Life - Part 3

A stage of Meaningful quality in your life.

1.    Do you have a purpose in life! Why were you born!

a.    Consider this: Your purpose in life is to know who you are:-

                                          i.    Are you your Body? Your mind?Your Education? Your degrees?

                                        ii.    Are you your heritage? Your family? Your background? Your caste? Your creed? Your religion?

                                       iii.    Are you your wealth, your possessions? Money? Land?

                                       iv.    What about the position you hold? Your achievements? Your Degrees? 
                          Your awards?

                                        v.    Father, Mother, Son, Daughter, Husband, Wife, you name it?

b.    All this will pass away! So WHO indeed are you?

c.    Another Consideration: The only thing that does not change:- you came with it, and will go with it when everything else has disintegrated: Call it Spirit – Soul – Atman.

d.    You never were born – you always existed – when this so called sojourn on Earth began, you were given a body, but you always existed, and this body will one day disintegrate, but you will live – as spirit as you were before.

e.    But maybe not exactly as before – you will have now a deeper consciousness of who you. And I would dare to suggest, you will have a Divine Consciousness.

f.     I would believe, we are all part of the Divine, and our purpose in life, is not only to become aware of this Divine Consciousness, but to share it with all of creation around me, thus creating a world of Love, Peace and Joy.

g.    I come from God! I live in God! I will go Back to God.

What are you doing to improve the Quality of your Life - Part 2

So what do I do in such a situation?

Here is a line of reflection you could follow:

1.    My past, my background, my up bringing defines my present, my future.

a.  Do I understand this? What is the baggage from the past that I am carrying? Am I carrying resentments, prejudices, pains, angers, hurts or whatever from my past?

b.  Did I grow up in abject poverty? Did I grow up in a dysfunctional family? Was I abused as a child?

c.  Did one or both parents die when I was a child? Did I experience divorce between my parents? Did either of my parents abandon me as a child?

d.  I cannot really enumerate all the events that may contribute to my present day situation. But I hope you get the situation. The answers to your present day situation will most certainly be found in your early or recent past.

e.  A word of caution: Your Ego or Pride will do its utmost to convince you that your problem does not lie in your past but in those around you:- Your Spouse, your Boss, your Mother-in-law, the markets, spiraling prices, the devil and even God. If you believe this, then you are helpless and become a victim!

f.   Instead take responsibility. This does not mean you are to blame. This only mean that you are willing to look into your life, that you are willing to use your ability to RESPOND rather than REACT to a situation.

g.  We react because we are frightened. We DO NOT SEEM TO HAVE CHOICES. To respond, to heal, we must have resources. We ALL possess these resources. Unfortunately, our upbringing has convinced us that we don’t have resources, and must depend on others. (Parents, relatives, teachers, etc.) The more I understand that I am enough! That I have every thing I possibly need to live a humane and effective life, the more free, joyful and successful will I be.

2. As you pass this stage of resolving issues from your past, you could gently move on to the second stage.

Continued in next post.

Malcolm sj - Challenges in Family Life -Episode 3 Eng #ChallengesinFamil...

Malcolm sj - Cahllenges in Family Life -Episode 1 #counselling

What are you doing to improve the Quality of your Life - Part 1

A Recollection is a term commonly used in the Catholic Christian Tradition when Religious (Priest, Nuns, Brothers) took time for a day, a week end, a week or even a month, to be silent, pray and reflect on how their interior life was going on. Today in the Corporate world too, some attempt is being made to give employees the advantage of silence, meditation, reflection etc. Another common term interchangeable with Recollection, is Retreat. Which literally means exactly that, to go back in time and become aware of where one could make changes to improve the quality of his or her life.

A Recollection is to recollect memories, to recall memories, to remember. And as we remember, we literally  re–member, that is put together, as different from dis - member. A dis-membering is a breaking up, a scattering, while re-membering is a bringing together, from fragmented to unifying.  To experience a wholeness, a rebirth, a GESTALT!

As days and weeks and months pass, we get involved. We want to give the best of ourselves, we reach out, work hard. Soon we forget ourselves, get lost in the events of each day. We are no more in control. We get depleted, tired, worn out, lonely, irritable and a part of us begins to withdraw. Soon we get isolated. From family, friends, companions, people and quite likely from God. We soon begin to look at life around us in an aggressive way. Finding fault, criticizing, judging people and their performance.

Loneliness sets in. This is a critical juncture in ones life. The resultant behaviours might lead to unsavoury company, drinking, smoking, drugs, extra marital sex and a variety of behaviours that might take one spiraling down the drain.  It’s time to find an oasis, to soothe our thirst, to rest our head, to be alone, to recall, to remember, to recollect. Find a reliable friend a confidante or even a counselor with whom one can open up and share.

Continued in next post as Part 2

Malcolm Brother sj - Challenges in Family Life - #counseling - English

An Extract from Debbie Ford.

Debbie Ford is one of my favourite authors. Needles to say, she has impressed me and inspired me a great deal. Through her writings, I have learned to heal a lot of my ‘Shadow Self’. I’d like to share with you an inspiring page from one of her books.

Ford, Debbie (2009-10-13).

The Secret of the Shadow: The Power of Owning Your Story

Imagine that you knew at birth that you were a master, that you were powerful beyond measure, that you possessed enormous gifts, and that all it would take to deliver your gifts to the world was your desire. Imagine that you came into this world with your heart filled with the healing power of love and that your only desire was to bestow that love onto all those around you. Imagine that you had the innate ability to create and have all that you want and all that you need. Is it possible that at some point in your life you knew that there was no one else in the world like you? And that in every fiber of your being you knew that you not only possessed the light of the world, but that you were the light of the world? Is it possible that at one time you knew who you were at the deepest level and you rejoiced in your gifts? Take a moment now, and see if you can remember that time when you knew the truth

Then something happened. Your world changed. Something or someone cast a shadow on your light. From that moment on you feared that you and your precious gifts were no longer safe in the world. You felt that if you didn’t hide your sacred gift it might be abused, injured, or taken away from you. Deep inside, you knew that this gift was like a precious, innocent child that was yours to protect. So you did what any good parent would do: You hid all your magnificence deep inside so that no one would ever discover it, so that no one could hurt it or take it away from you.

Then, with the creativity of a child, you covered it up. You created an act, a persona, a drama, a story so that nobody would ever suspect that you were the keeper of so much light. You were very smart— brilliant, actually— at hiding your secret. Not only did you convince others that you were not that; you also convinced yourself— all because you were being a good parent to the gift that you held. It was your secret— your deep, dark secret, which only you knew. You were even creative enough to manifest the exact opposite of that which you truly are so that you could protect yourself from those who might be upset or angered by your innate gifts.
But after days months and years of hiding your treasure, you began to believe your story. You became the persona you created to protect your secret. At that moment you forgot that you had ever buried your treasured gift in the first place. You not only forgot where you had hidden it, you forgot that you had hidden it at all. Your light, love, greatness and beauty got lost inside your story. You forgot that you had a secret.
From that moment on, you felt lost, alone, separate and scared. Suddenly you became aware that there was something missing - and there was.

Perhaps its time now for your lamp to shine before the world once again. Find and take ownership of your Secret - that you are light, love, greatness, beauty and so much more and become free once again. 

Teach Only Love for that is what you are!

Teach your children only Love, for that is what you are. Your child will only be in large measure what you are and who you are! So you owe it to yourself and to your child/children to develop your own personal life: Heal your memories, forgive everyone in your life, including yourself. Cultivate a positive outlook. Nurture yourself in everyway.

Children are an expression of your love! Love them by giving them what they need, not what they want. Spend quality time with your children. Do not fill their lives with toys. Toys can never replace your love. Respect them as persons, do not treat them as so much furniture. Children are like wet cement; the impression you make on them when they are young, stays with them for life. Be honest to them and about them. Have atleast one meal a day as a family; "A family that eats together, stays together." Similarly I'd say, "A hug in time saves nine." Be affectionate without being possessive. Finally be supportive to the child, do not expect the child to fullfil your needs.

Let me quote Mother Teresa of happy memory, "I think today the world is upside down, and is suffering so much because there is so very little love in the home and in family life. We have no time for our children, we have no time for each other, there IS No Time to enjoy each other."

Teach your Children Only Love, for that is what YOU ARE. I hope you honestly believe that you are an embodiment of LOVE! All religions teach us that God is Love. If we emanated from God then we can be no less. A simpler idea to start with, and perhaps more acceptable, is that we are all born beautiful. Only somewhere down the road we seem to have forgotten that. Let us not blame our parents, even as our children may do the same to us. Louise Hay in her book, “You can heal your life” says, “we are all victims of victims”. The only way to break that cycle is to forgive everyone in your life including yourself and begin to love and appreciate yourself. Thus you will begin a whole new relationship with all those around you.

We are LOVE Incarnate. Love has no choice but to reach out. Simply because Love is not love, until it expresses itself in myriad ways. Just as the Infinite expresses itself through each one of us, let each one of us in turn create a world of peace, harmony, brotherhood and sisterhood by reaching out to each other.

Happiness

I wonder how many of us choose to be happy. Perhaps happiness is not even there on our menu of choices. What is worse (I believe) that most of us don't even believe that happiness is a result of choices we make. I guess that many of us may think happiness comes from getting the chocolate I want, regardless. The end result is, that if I don't get what I want, I get irritated, angry or downright mad at every one.
As a matter of fact, happiness is not a destination or something to be achieved. Happiness is the way. We must be happy in everything we do, no matter what. From drinking a cup of coffee to handling a major job. We give our best when we are happy and enjoying whatever it is we are doing.
Happiness is an attitude that needs to be cultivated very early in childhood. Happy parents bring up happy children.

Choose today to express happiness from your heart and enliven every thing you do.
Choose today to be happy rather than right!
Choose today to be happy rather than successful!
Make happiness your way of life!!!